I enjoy being in a rush. I get more stressed and anxious when I have nothing to do than when I'm constanly on my way somewhere. Seeing my calendar filled with events that have been written in different colours depending on how important they are excites me, I lose my mind when I'm stuck somewhere without company and action. I'd probably end up chewing off my own toes and fingers just out of pure boredom if I became unemployed for a longer period of time, I'd rather work as a street fundraiser or telemarketer than just sit around in my pyjamas all day long.
I'm heading back north to visit my folks this weekend. I have to admit that I'm not exactly jumping out of joy since every time I go there I feel like I'm going back in time. Suddenly all those things I had already forgotten come back to haunt me and I withdraw back into my shell where I spent most of my early teenage years in. I'm looking forward to giving my mom, dad and baby brother a big hug, though, it's not (entirely) their fault I felt so trapped in that town some five to ten years ago.
I've never been big on planning ahead and I hate grey routine life but not having any routines also makes life pretty unbearable after a while. I've always been pretty OCD and I need to do certain things in a certain order to keep myself sane. My sister ordered the daily newspaper for me for two months and I'm already excited about once again having the chance of reading a paper during my morning coffee after taking a shower and picking out socks that match my underwear.
My future remains a question mark, but at least I feel I'm going in the right direction now.
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